Surrendering Control
- nicolelogan
- Jun 23
- 2 min read
So I found out there was a reason for my negative thoughts. I was experiencing a side effect from my new preventative migraine medication. The thoughts got darker and I got scared. They were so out of character for me at this point in my life that I wasn’t sure what was happening. Luckily, my daughter reminded me that I started this new medication and that this could be a side effect. There it was, in large bold letters, “suicidal thoughts and ideation occur in 1 of 500 people.” ONE IN FIVE HUNDRED! That seems like a lot to me. But it explained a lot. I decided to push back my journey to Europe and stay with my son and daughter-in-law for a while longer.
I hesitated to share this with people, but I realized that not talking about it is why we still have such a stigma with mental health. This was a biochemical reaction to a drug that was prescribed to me. It has nothing to do with being “mentally weak.” I also think it’s important to remember that anything can happen while we are traveling. Personally, I’m glad it happened before I left the US instead of while I was traveling.
I truly believe that things happen for a reason. I always look at what I’ve learned from something that seems “negative.” I learned that I need to slow down. My self imposed timeline can change and it’s okay. I’ve learned over and over that life doesn’t care about your plans, things happen and you need to roll with them. I think much of life is us learning to surrender and stop trying to control every outcome. At least, that seems how my life has been:)
Now I am in Indiana, staying with my son and daughter-in-law, enjoying every moment. To be honest, I’m not ready to leave. And that’s okay. It’s okay to change your mind, pivot, change direction, do something totally different than what you had planned. It usually ends up being better than your original plans. I’m practicing letting go of control and enjoying each moment as it comes. ♥️
Pictures from our trip to Mackinac Island
Gorgeous photos and gorgeous post from a gorgeous woman with important thoughts and essential points we can all consider in this hectic life. We can press ‘pause’; we can tell ourselves “It is okay. It is all going to be alright. It IS already alright!”